Home is this idea
I had
once upon a time in my head
a far off place
of longing
and yearning
of desperately seeking to return
a destination outside of myself
where my parents still laughed
…together
and my sisters saw me as
…perfection
and I knew that I
…belonged
For too many years now
I’ve wandered in search of it
dreaming of being cradled
within its warm, secure walls
the certainty that I would never find it
only quelled by the hope that I might yet
and made nostalgic by the fantasy of
“could have”s
and
“should have”s
and
“might still be”s
Until one day I wandered back into myself
and cast away those coulds, shoulds, and mights,
lifted the veil that shrouded the past in a pink idealistic mist
It was there that I found the destination was within
and I learned that home
was a space already perfectly made
inside of me
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